Why are you reading this and not watching VelociPastor?
Review: Hors D’oeuvre [-SHORT FILM-]
Hors D'oeuvre...Director: Aleksandra SvetlichnayaWriter: Aleksandra SvetlichnayaStars: Aleksandra Svetlichnaya, Mariela Castillo, Sarah Megan MaltzReviewAleksandra Svetlichnaya created the Dinnerverse 4 years ago, kicked off by the incredible Dinner (2015), followed by Breakfast (2016) and Midnight Snack (2018). Her Buffy influences were on full display through those 3 films, all of them featuring monsters, face kicking and a... Continue Reading →
Fantasia 2019 Review: Homewrecker [-FILM-]
Homewrecker...Director: Zach GayneWriter: Precious Chong, Alex EssoeStars: Alex Essoe, Precious Chong, Kris SiddiqiReviewIf you ever need a visual definition of awkwardness then Homewrecker should be hanging on the wall. A film that is so awkward you find yourself cringing hard during every excruciating scene, a film that plays on the horrible social politics of being... Continue Reading →
Fantasia 2019 Review: Door Lock [-FILM-]
Door Lock...Director: Kwon LeeWriters: Park Jung-Hee, Kwon LeeStars: Hyo-Jin Kong, Ye-Won Kim, Seong-oh KimReviewKyung-min lives alone in a studio apartment in a large building under the false assumption that this filing cabinet for humans is safer for her. With so many tenants, surely she will be one of the many faceless people and will be... Continue Reading →
Review: Midsommar [-FILM-]
Midsommar...Director: Ari AsterWriter: Ari AsterStars: Florence Pugh, Jack Reynor, Vilhelm BlomgrenReviewAri Aster shook up the horror world in 2018 with Hereditary. A large contingent of fans were calling for Toni Collette to win an Oscar for her portrayal of Annie, a mother dealing with unimaginable grief and battling against her family's history of mental illness.... Continue Reading →
Fantasia 2019 Review: A Good Woman Is Hard To Find [-FILM-]
A Good Woman Is Hard To Find... Director: Abner Pastoll Writer: Ronan Blaney Stars: Sarah Bolger, Edward Hogg, Andrew Simpson Review With his second feature length film, director Abner Pastoll has gifted us once again with a movie that places ordinary people into extraordinary predicaments. Written by Ronan Blaney, A Good Woman is Hard to... Continue Reading →
Fantasia 2019 Review: 8 [-FILM-]
8...Director: Harold HolscherWriter: Harold HolscherStars: Inge Beckmann, Garth Breytenbach, Tshamano SebeReview8 begins with William (Breytenbach), Sarah (Beckmann) and daughter Mary (Luna) arriving at William's father's farm in South Africa. After settling in, Mary comes into contact with a mysterious man called Lazuras (Sebe). After this meeting Lazuras becomes a farm hand, whilst Sarah is very... Continue Reading →
Fantasia 2019 Review: The Wretched [-FILM-]
The Wretched...Directors: Brett Pierce, Drew T. PierceWriters: Brett Pierce, Drew T. PierceStars: Azie Tesfai, Piper Curda, Kevin BigleyReviewCelebrating it’s world premiere at the 2019 Fantasia Film Festival, The Wretched is a m odern day fairy tale that clings to the grim reality of what a fairy tale actually is. You won’t find any gorgeous young... Continue Reading →
Review: Luz [-FILM-]
Luz... Director: Tilman Singer Writers: Tilman Singer Stars: Luana Velis, Johannes Benecke, Jan Bluthardt, Julia Riedler, Nadja Stübiger Review Art is all about creativity and creativity breeds ingenuity. Luz is a mixture of these things, in amongst some excellent acting and a thick atmosphere where things are not quite as they seem. The story begins... Continue Reading →
Fantasia 2019 Review: Dreadout [-FILM-]
Dreadout...Director: Kimo StamboelWriter: Kimo StamboelStars: Caitlin Halderman, Jefri Nichol, Marsha Aruan, Irsyadillah, Ciccio Manassero, Susan Sameh, Mike LucockReviewIndonesian horror is on the up, the Satan's Slaves remake was remarkable and you can add Dreadout to the list as well. Based on a PC game of the same name, Dreadout is South Asian teen horror by way of... Continue Reading →
Review: Trespassers [-FILM-]
Trespassers...Director: Orson OblowitzWriter: Corey DeshonStars: Fairuza Balk, Angela Trimbur, Zach Avery, Janel Parrish, Johnathan HowardReviewWhen two couples go to a secluded luxury house in desert country, to escape from their problems, things end up going sideways. Sarah (Trimbur), Joseph (Avery) and Estelle (Parrish) & Victor (Howard) are the couples and whilst Sarah and Estelle are... Continue Reading →
Fantasia 2019 Review: Sadako [-FILM-]
Sadako...Director: Hideo NakataWriters: Noriaki SugiharaStars: Himeka Himejima, Elaiza Ikeda, Ren KiriyamaReviewPlaying at Fantasia Film Festival 2019, Sadako is Hideo Nakata's return to the Ringu world. In the first Ringu Nakata had it dripping it menace and fear, unfortunately with Sadako most of that is gone and replaced with a very standard and seen-it-before storyline.After an... Continue Reading →
Review: Darlin’ [-FILM-]
Darlin'...Director: Pollyanna McIntoshWriters: Pollyanna McIntoshStars: Pollyanna McIntosh, Lauryn Canny, Bryan Batt, Lauren Ashley CarterReviewDarlin' starts with The Woman (McIntosh) dropping off Darlin (Canny) at the local hospital, Darlin is feral, dirty and naturally the 'civilised' world comes to her 'rescue' to clean her up. With no legal documents or family vouching for her, Darlin is turned over... Continue Reading →
Review: Bit [-FILM-]
Bit...Director: Brad Michael ElmoreWriter: Brad Michael ElmoreStars: Nicole Maines, M.C. Gainey, Diana HopperReviewStarring Nicole Maines (Supergirl) as Laurel, Bit gifts us with a feminist vampire film that celebrates all of the colors of the Pride flag without ever hitting us over the head with preachiness or slowing down the action in favor of heavy handed... Continue Reading →
Movie Review: Head Count
Head Count is a good thriller that has a fairly crazy climax. Callahan is definitely one to watch and she has a few things headed our in the next few years.
Film Review: Rondo
Rondo is a sleazy, odd, confronting and violent exploitation-esque film that plays by its own rules...and I love it.
Movie Review – Godzilla: King Of The Monsters
Godzilla: King Of The Monsters...Director: Michael DoughertyWriters: Michael Dougherty, Zach ShieldsStars: Kyle Chandler, Vera Farmiga, Millie Bobby Brown, Ken Watanabe, Sally Hawkins, Ziyi Zhang, Bradley Whitford, Charles DanceReviewGodzilla was originally created as a response to nuclear dangers and mankind's relationship to and co-existence with nature. Not much has changed, we're still shit scared of nuclear... Continue Reading →
Movie Review: Body At Brighton Rock
Body At Brighton Rock...Director: Roxanne BenjaminWriter: Roxanne BenjaminStars: Karina Fontes, Casey Adams, Emily Althaus ReviewWendy (Fontes) is a new national park guide/ranger. She isn't a very good one either, she cares nothing for the job, is wildly out of her depth and it shows. She trades trails with another guide and after going on her... Continue Reading →
Movie Review: I Trapped The Devil
I Trapped The Devil...Director: Josh LoboWriter: Josh LoboStars: AJ Bowen, Scott Poythress, Susan BurkeReviewVisiting family at Christmas is always fraught with worry but what if you had to deal with normal family issues plus a family member that has a terrible secret?When Matt (Bowen) and his wife Karen (Burke) turn up unexpectedly at Christmas at Matt's... Continue Reading →
What The Fest!? Review: One Cut Of The Dead
One Cut Of The Dead...Director: Shin'ichirô UedaWriter: Shin'ichirô Ueda (screenplay)Stars: Takayuki Hamatsu, Yuzuki Akiyama, Harumi ShuhamaReviewPlaying as part of What The Fest!? One Cut Of The Dead is a Zombie film that is not a Zombie film or it is? Call it what you want but one thing is for sure this film has a... Continue Reading →